On February 17, 2009, all analog TVs in
America will go kaput. Turn on your trusty Zenith, and you'll get —
static. Whack it as much as you want (and feel free to take out your
frustrations), but it won't do any good. The TV set itself is still
perfectly fine. It's the analog broadcast signal that's the problem. In
particular, it won't be there anymore.
Blame the government. It's requiring all broadcasters to abandon
analog TV transmission. Since it was the federal government that
mandated conversion to digital TV — thereby instigating one of the
greatest instances of technological obsolescence ever — it's willing to
lend you a hand. Owners of the (very conservatively estimated) zillions
of obsolete TVs can get coupons worth 40 bucks apiece toward the
purchase of a converter box that will let analog sets display
over-the-air digital broadcasts. To fund that program, Uncle Sam has
set aside $1.5 billion — mere peanuts compared with the $10 billion
he's getting for raffling off your spectrum.
The giveaway isn't need-based. Just ask, and ye shall receive — up
to two coupons per household. Even if you subscribe to cable or
satellite TV (and don't really need an over-the-air box), you can still
ask for a coupon (maybe for that old TV in the guest room). This part
of the program will be funded up to $990 million. When that money runs
out, there's another chunk of $510 million waiting — reserved for
households not connected to cable or satellite. Either way, don't wait
too long: There are enough coupons to cover only half the TVs receiving
over-the-air broadcasts.
You're probably asking, What the heck??? Why is the federal
government massively subsidizing the electronics companies that make
converter boxes? Instead of issuing millions of coupons that are just
freebies for those companies, the government should take the $10
billion of auction money and give it back to the owners of the public
airwaves: the public. Instead of huge profits for corporations, just
give the $10B back to us. Let us decide what to do with the money;
don't force us to buy boxes. Since the government is giving the public
a spectrum-sized headache, each of us should at least get enough cash
to buy some aspirin. Then we'll call it even.
